To quote the Loony Toons, ‘That’s All Folks’...Christmas is over. Yes the fat lady has sung (and signed up for bobdysculpt) but there is still one final trial to navigate through before we can finally say ‘that’s it for another year anyways.’ For many of us, today sees us return to work and with that particular pleasure comes the added joy of hearing and saying the same post Christmas chatter.
Here are the Top 5 things you’ll hear on your first day back after Christmas.
1. ‘How was your Christmas?’
Make no mistake. People don’t care how your Christmas was so keep your answer short and vague. An ‘Ah yeah quiet, you know yourself’ will suffice before you have to answer the very same question 34 seconds later.
2. ‘Oh God, I have LITERALLY put on 10 stone’
This particular gem is most likely to be delivered by the Victoria's Secrets model who looks like she has survived on an avocado and a bowl of steam for the entire time.
3. ‘That’s me now, I’m DEFINITELY off the booze for the January!’
Said with noble and sincere intent but they’ll be following this up in the pub later this evening by ‘Yeah but wine doesn’t count sure it doesn’t...it’s basically fruit juice’.
4. ‘It’s great to be back though all the same...I was getting bored’
This is to be met with the cold stony silence it deserves.
5. ‘Have you watched Making A Murderer yet?...NO?...OH MY GOD!...I like did it in a day!’
If you have no intention of watching the Netflix phenomenon, you can simply bluff your way out of it by saying ‘I know right?...but I’m only on episode 6 so no spoilers’. This will shut them up immediately.
But seriously you should watch it...it is amazing.
