So, it's the first official day back to work, college and school. Isn't it great to be back?! Cough. Yea....It's lovely to catch up with everyone and see how their holidays went. However, after roughly two hours, you'll have a pain in your face hearing the same few phrases (and no doubt, you've used them yourself):
1) 'I got 56 minutes of sleep last night' - According to Twitter / Facebook and just general office chit chat, no one slept a bloody wink last night. We'll blame it on the full moon and say nothing about the booze and food fueled fortnight we've all had right?
2) 'Ah, it was quiet, you know yourself' - Everyone claims their Christmas was quiet but how truthful are they being? Was it really quiet or are you telling porkies?! Your days might have been quiet but were your nights? 'Fess up now.
3) 'I'm being good, that's it now' - Yes, the annual January detox is on like Donkey Kong. New Year, new you. Clearly, you need to overhaul your whole life. The entire population is planning to exist on dust and air for the month of January. To be fair, we've probably eaten enough over the past two weeks to get us through 'til March.
4) 'I'm not stirring until February now' - The bank balances have taken a hit and the clothes are feeling slightly tighter. Naturally, the only answer is to live like a hermit for January. There's not a person in the country who didn't make false promises to themselves last night. False promises get us through those dark days. We'll give it two weeks.
5) 'I'm booking a holiday' - Everyone needs a goal to work towards - a little weekend away would do very nicely. It would make those dark, hermit-like January evenings a lot easier wouldn't it? Bet the airlines and last minute getaway websites are rubbing their hands today. Is there a book now, pay later option? Sorted.
